no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
he walked in on you at the party drunkenly dancing alone on the bed wearing mardi gras beads, sunglasses, and using one ski pole as a microphone.... and you STILL got laid. i dont get your life.
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
I'm like five sips away from making a Craigslist post for true love and mustaches. My family is going to disown me tonight.
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
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