I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
I should have some sort of frequent buyer card or something. I just bought my third bottle of Captain this week. It's Wednesday.
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
I think we might need a safe word for this...
Randomize
