"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
Drunk is not a location!
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
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