i just identified you from a description of your pipe
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
You gotta start bringing a flask to work so you can get a head start
Possibly a very genius or very terrible idea...
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
