Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
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