I puked while I was brushing my teeth this morning and had to get a new tbrush
Ew, did you brush them again?
Yeah but i puked on the new one and decided to give up...failure
So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
Randomize
