The funny thing about my wife cheating on me is that the guy probably has genital warts now. Sweet.
this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
I've decided it's okay if I take a pregnancy test every month. Then I can be like, "Good job, self, way to not procreate this month!"
Randomize