I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
My father has a definite type: blonde, busty, 18-22. It was awkward when I was in college, but now I'm over it. I play wingman for him and he buys me expensive purses for the assistance in getting him hooked up with girls younger than me. Win-win.
Randomize
