Passed out watching pirates of caribbean with vodka in hand. Woke up to jenna jameson, with vodka gone.
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
I honestly don't understand how your night went from singing a touching rendition of Africa to an angry political rant to low key trying to find a frat boy to bang to doing dishes to yoga
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
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