she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
Your shoe was in the washing machine. I have it in my pocket. My phone rang before and I answered your shoe. Meet me at the bar in 10.
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
Randomize
