its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
The cops found weed in michael jacksons house today...it makes up for the child molesting, I like him more now.
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
