so explain again why im purple
no
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
Neighbor who got arrested at 3am just said he'd split the $ with me if I testify as the witness in his police brutality trial. He was also holding a baby and a case of beer.
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
Randomize
