I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
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