If you text me again I will gut all of your stuffed animals.
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
Okay we're getting vodka and coming
Okay. Joe has my machete attached to his belt
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
Randomize
