Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
I called him a "Beautiful Bastard" with "Beautiful Bastard Hair". That is how you pick up a guy from Denmark.
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize
