"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
I thought the Bane mask would really repel dudes but instead I ended up grinding on a frat dude that whispered "bad bitch contest, you in first place" in my ear in a Batman voice
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Randomize
