How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
i just remebered what i did last night, i asked a homeless man on a bike "hey whatcha doin with that bike, wanna make 5 bucks?" he agreed and then rode me on his handle bars a block away to the next bar.
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
Randomize