Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
porn star boner night. come get it.
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
New rule: gentleman callers are required to bring me gifts of beer when coming over to court you. Tell the monster jam dudes so they know.
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
YOUR STATE IS STUPID
Did you miss a turn again?
WHAT FUCKING IDIOT DECIDED TO DESIGN AN ENTIRE FUCKING STATE WHERE YOU CAN'T MAKE A FUCKING LEFT TURN?!? FUCK NEW JERSEY
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
Randomize
