Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
Don't judge me like that. At least the house is getting cleaned. If I have to drink and listen to Disney music on repeat for that to happen, so be it.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
