I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
I just realized I use Twitter to keep of track of when I get drunk.
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
Randomize
