What's wrong?
Long week. Sore muscles. Bad back. Hangover. Mini-keg. Crazy ex-wife. Unavailable love-interest. Dead celebrity families. Republicans.
Pussy.
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
I said "sucks to suck" to a cop last night. We've been snapchatting.
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
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