I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
When this bachelor party is over and your life is in ruins, you have my permission to die.
We're using joints as your birthday candles
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
Randomize
