Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Randomize
