i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
You could sing the national anthem right before we have sex. Make it feel like a sporting event
I just want somebody who'll randomly bring me pizza and lovingly squeeze my butt. Is there a dating app for that, do you think?
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
Randomize
