I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
She has an emergency bra in her purse. I'm gonna check no on the 'introducing her to my new boyfriend' box.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
my nose is crying tears of wow.
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Randomize
