Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
You're earring is so big in my mouth
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
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