Do you know my vagina holds 14 pints of water?
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
I wish there were birth control emojis
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
I bet you my entire life savings of $0 that there's a Doctor Who porn parody and that it features the sonic screwdriver being inserted into some cavities
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
Randomize