vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
So you told me to remind you that you vomited 3 times in the street because you would forget so here is your reminder
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
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