OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
Randomize
