found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
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