Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
Remember when we thought adulthood would be different than college?
It is different. We had hopes and dreams back then. Now we're just alcoholics.
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