Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
OH FOR FUCKS SAKE! SOMEONE TOOK ME FOR A GODDAMN PROSTITUTE!! IM WEARING LEG WARMERS!!! THAT IS LIKE THE LEAST HOOKERISH THING TO WEAR!
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
I literally just skipped to the fridge when I realized we had enough vodka left to get day drunk
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
Randomize