My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
why im i the only drunk person in the library?
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
It's not my fault. Someone keeps buying me tequila shots. Idk who. But every time I look down there's another. I think there's a conspiracy.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
This is the third time this year I've whored myself for a Netflix login. If this guy changes his password, I'm gonna fucking give up.
Or maybe pay for Netflix?
I'm not that desperate yet.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
The prescription the hospital gave me for pain and nausea doubles for my hangovers... Maybe I'll hit up the ER more often
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
Randomize
