exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
The real estate's complaint had the words "loud squealing at 2am" in it. Then I remembered that was me spoon feeding you guys old potato salad while you screeched like baby birds. Great night.
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
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