Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
How do you jack off and text at the same time?
On my iPhone they have an app for that
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
I'm so high I just tried to eat a hair tie thinking it was one of my pretzels.
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
Randomize