question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
Best elective surgery ever. Having a great time ignoring girls' pleas to pull out and blowing it inside anyway. I like to watch them absolutely freak out and go batshit crazy for 20 mins before I mention the snip-snip surgery. Power trip.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
Siri makes being stoned even easier. I don't even Have to type my texts myself
Though I typed a half of that one
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
Last night I tried to apply for a job at ihop. That drunk.
Randomize
