the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
Just managed to stab myself in the ass with a fork. I feel that as my best friend, I'm obligated by friend code to inform you of that sort of thing.
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
Randomize
