just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
It seems that I didn’t convey clearly enough how well and truly fucked we are, Jack. Listen to me very closely: we are DEAD.
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
