wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
Randomize
