He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
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