He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
the room spins SO much faster in panama
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
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