That's intense
i just had 3 doubles lined up on top of a urinal, texting with one hand and my dick in the other. I an fucking awesome.
I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
Randomize
