The funny thing is... I'm about to go to the store to buy WD-40 and condoms... That's it.
And before you ask they are unrelated purchases.
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
It's just like the Real World with babies
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
There is nothing more embarrassing than your birth control alarm going off while in a meeting with your boss and they tell you to take it.
You blacked out and then went around stealing other peoples phones and leaving yourself voicemails
I got two from random numbers, the first was me and said "Don't forget you murdered Josh in Wii Bowling"
The second Jenn said "You are ridiculously smart for drunk dialing yourself"
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
If you think I'm not petty enough to drive to your house at 3 in the goddamn morning just to punch you, you underestimate me.
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
Randomize
