Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
My bed is full of blood and feathers
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
You better buy her a motherfucking bunnyrabit to make up for this. And me footsie pajamas for being a cockblock.
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
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