How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
She kept saying "I didn't do it" but she was so drunk she forgot her pee was orange from her UTI medicine.
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
Randomize
