Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
The woman at walgreens tried to sell me clearance condoms with my fake eyelashes. Does it look like I get laid?
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
Randomize