she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
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