No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
24 hour fitness called offering me a free trial stating that you referred them to me. I told them you have been taking pics of naked guys in the locker room and selling them online.
That's not a bad idea, actually...
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
I'm currently witnessing my drunk neighbor attempting to fold laundry on his front lawn. I think he's trying to spell out HELP.
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
This is the third time this year I've whored myself for a Netflix login. If this guy changes his password, I'm gonna fucking give up.
Or maybe pay for Netflix?
I'm not that desperate yet.
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
Randomize
