Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
why does every cop we meet know your name?
Randomize