which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
I didn't have cash to pay cover at the bar, so I traded the bouncer a Krispy Kreme doughnut i had in my purse
I'm in my onesie attempting to spoon-feed myself cold soup. I'm playing freeze tag with my hangover. My hangover's winning.
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
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