i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
I was freaked out. No man over 50 is allowed to touch me. Ever. Unless you're Michael Bolton. Then please do.
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
I am going to tweet NASA until they put me into space
Those rocketship riding assholes need the common man
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
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