What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
So i woke up on a park bench... Using my shoe as a pillow, cuddling a empty handle of vodka... Yet I'm still in my living room. Someone please tell me why all my vodkas gone? I'll deal with the park bench situation at a later time.
This Cougar is looking at me like I’m a piece of meat and buying me top shelf cocktails
I’m getting a fear boner thinking about what she might do to me
Randomize
